You are experiencing exactly what you want to experience

Some of you might look at the title of this blog and think "NO the hell I am not where I want to be." And that is only expected. Why? Because we don't have the cars we want, the relationships we want, the house, the job, the money, etc. We are experiencing emotional and physical pains. We are getting older and we are overweight. There is a whole host of things that seem so wrong with this moment right here that we can't help but think, "There has got to be more than this!"

And there is... but before we get to that, lets think on the title of this blog for a bit. You are right were you want to be, experiencing exactly what you want to be experiencing. In this moment, you are experiencing the very emotions you want to experience. HMMMMMM

Now the thought is, WHY would I want to experience this??? And that I can't answer for you. But the question I would ask you is if you don't want to experience it, why are you spending so much time thinking about it?

Our thoughts drive our lives. And the thoughts we think stimulate emotions within us. So if we spend more time thinking about the things that are stimulating emotions we "don't want to feel" - what are we going to feel???? You got it - BAD!!! And honestly, we are gonna keep experiencing the same thing until we get tired of it. So if you are thinking about the negative things happening in your life and how bad you feel about them, more negative things will show up so you can keep feeling bad. Seems counter productive but we do it to ourselves.

So yes, something as simple as a change of mind can change our experiences in life. Right now there is something happening in your life that you get joy from thinking about. Close your eyes and dwell on it for a few moments. How did that feel in your body? Did you experience warm fuzzy feelings? Did you find yourself smiling just a bit? Did something else pop into your mind that was joyful? With that memory and that feeling lingering, how do you feel now? Better??? (until you start thinking about what's going wrong again... stop that!)

Free will is the ability to experience whatever you want to experience in thought and emotion. Material expression/manifestation is the physical counterpart to extend that experience. God's gift is free will, freedom of expression and God will not limit our ability to have the types of experiences we want to have. So if what is showing up in your life are things that cause you to feel sorrow or pain, find out what's going on in your mind. Chances are your thoughts are focused on the sorrow and pain and inadvertently continuing to manifest situations that perpetuate those feelings.

So how do you change the cycle? Change what you spend your time thinking about. Think about the good that is in your life. Remind yourself of the blessings. Spend time with people that make you feel good. Do things for yourself that bring you joy. Pay attention to your mood, when it sinks into a negative space pay attention to what you are thinking in that moment and change it.

You really are in control of how you feel from moment to moment by the power of the thoughts that you hold in your mind. The thoughts that you hold in your mind will manifest as situations to perpetuate more of those feelings - whatever they are. And nothing can or will change your experience except you.

Own that power and transform your life.

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” Viktor Frankl from 'A Man's Search for Meaning'

Life: Abundantly

Life: Abundantly

“Most of you are much closer to a financial fortune [better body, romantic partnership, car, house, prosperous business, etc.] than you are even allowing yourself to purely desire, because, in the thought that it might come, you right away begin thinking of how disappointed you will be if it does not come. And so, in your lackful thought, you do not allow yourself to desire or to expect anything magnificent in terms of money; and that is the reason why, for the most part, you are living rather mediocre financial experiences.” ~ Esther and Jerry Hicks from Money, and the Law of Attraction

I remember having a daydream when I was in my early twenties. In this vision, God stood before me with a gift. It was a miraculous gift, because it was from God. It was just what I needed and wanted and perhaps was just the first of many. As God stood there holding this gift before me, I stood there with my arms at my side. Here it was, all I needed and wanted to have was right in front of my face. Then the thought ran through my mind “You just have to reach out and take it.”

Why, even in the vision, didn’t I reach out at that moment and take what was being freely given to me? I think the answer is both multifaceted and universal – I was afraid. What would be required of me if I accepted it? Was the gift really even for me? What if this wasn’t what I thought it would be? What if I couldn’t handle the gift or the responsibility I thought came with it? So instead of opening myself wholeheartedly to accepting this gift, like a child diving face first into the pile of gifts under the Christmas tree, I second guessed myself and God.

I think it’s clear; we experience mediocrity because we believe in our mediocrity. We don’t allow ourselves to believe that the abundance of the Universe is our birthright. And who are we to deny God the pleasure of pleasing us? Why do we feel undeserving of gifts freely given by our creator who loves us unconditionally? Why do we even feel bad for wanting to be extravagantly blessed?

The Prayer of Jabez tells the story of a man that goes to heaven. During a tour of heaven, the angel reluctantly shows him a building that holds mounds of gifts. When he requested it, the angel takes him to the gifts meant for him. The angel, in the end, tells him that these are all the gifts God had prepared for his children that we didn’t receive during our lifetime.

Have you ever had a person refuse a gift you were giving? What excuses did they give? That they didn’t deserve it? That it was too much? That they were too embarrassed? They didn’t know if they could take care of it? They don’t have faith in their own worth and worthiness to receive the gifts you give in love. And these are the same excuses we give for not receiving the blessings that God has prepared for us.

James 4 talks about the faith of Abraham. Abraham’s faith was counted unto him as righteousness. The fact that Abraham believed God’s promise to make him the Father of many nations, even in his old age he kept to that faith and not only was the promise fulfilled, he was right with God because of his faith.

So if we understand that God is capable of doing far more abundantly than we can think or ask and that God WANTS to do far more for us than we can think or ask, unbounded belief in and acceptance of these gifts, in whatever form they take, is counted as righteousness unto us as well.

So it is actually RIGHTEOUSNESS, not selfishness, to believe that we are BLESSED BEYOND MEASURE and to have the FAITH to accept that all the promises of God are Yea and AMEN!

What have you been promised? Release the full capability of your faith. Set aside your doubts and fears and open yourself to the unlimited resources of the universe there for your benefit and wellbeing. Take the steps of faith that are necessary for your to “reach out” and grab the gifts awaiting you from God – start writing that book, designing those clothes, singing those songs, etc. – and you will begin to learn what it means to be prosperous and blessed.

When Grandma Died

When I was born, my Grandmother told my mother she would live to see be graduate. She almost did.

Even though she was really my aunt, I called her Grandma. She basically raised my mother and took care of me as a baby. I was always close to her and never thought it was strange that I had two grandmothers on one side of my family. I didn’t find out the reality of our relation until I was older, but it never made a difference to me.

It was scary for me when she got older. I never thought about life without her in it. I really got nervous when she was moved into a nursing home because she couldn’t live on her own and started forgetting things and people. But there was something about our bond. So special that she never forgot my name or who I was dispite the Alzheimers. So special that each time I left from a visit with her, there was a knowledge that I would see her again. Even with her going back and forth to the hospital, I knew I would see her again. Until my senior year in high school.

Grandma was back in the hospital, not unlike times past. But there was something different. The moment I walked into that hospital room that night in January 1990 it hit me like a ton of bricks. I knew this would be the last time I would see her alive.

She laid there in that bed with her eyes closed. I don’t know what she knew or didn’t know about who was there to see her. But as my mother and step-father stood beside her bed talking to her, I sat in the corner of the room in stunned silence. I hadn’t experienced a sorrow in my life as deep as that. I didn’t want to believe or accept the finality I knew in those moments. This was my special lady.

It wasn’t until the room was clear that I felt as if I could go to her side. I took her hand and cried like I never had before. I don’t know how long I stood there before I could finally speak to her and tell he how much I loved her. And somehow, by the grace of God, when I could let her hand go I was able to let her go. I knew she would be ok. I don’t know how long it was before the tears stopped that night. But once they were dry, I didn’t cry again - until this moment 19 years later as I think back on that night.

While she didn’t physically see me graduate, I know she was there. I know she’s been cheering me on and watching out for me just like she always did. And I still have po-ke-no, Connect Four, I D-clare War, Dueces, afternoons watching “the stories,” telling her to wake up and her telling we she was just resting her eyes - I have those memories and I know that means I will always have her in my heart.

I do miss her still.

Develop High Energy Habits

A friend and I had a conversation about how much time we waste doing things that are not moving us in the direction of our goals. I, for one, am a Facebook Addict. There I said it. I will log-in in the morning and stay connected all day long. I refresh the page to see if any of my friends have said something I just have to read and know and I play the games and send virtual gifts to my friends all day long. Now while I do get work done, I tend to piddle away any down time I have on Facebook. Then later in the day I feel bad because I didn’t accomplish anything with my day. At night and on the weekends it’s television (while being logged into Facebook). I will spend hours watching TV, even when there is nothing on I want to see. I spend relatively little time focused on the things that will help me create the life I desire to have.

Not to say that there is anything wrong with Facebook or watching TV or whatever it is that keeps us from following our path consistently, we all need to take downtime and just relax and enjoy ourselves. But when our lives become overrun with these things and we feel discontented with the progress we are making in our lives and careers, we need to pause and take notice.
These are low energy habits. These things keep us from the high energy, productive and creative lives we long to live. If you follow the lives of highly successful people, most of their time is spent in the pursuit of their goals and less on time and energy draining distractions. These people have not only keyed in on what they want to accomplish in their lives, they are taking the inspired steps to make those things a reality. And that is the main difference between them and the rest of us.

The difference between high energy and low energy activities is how you feel afterwards. When you complete a high energy activity, while you may be tired physically depending on the level of exertion, you feel the joy of having accomplished something. You feel renewed and more alive. The knowledge that you have made another step towards your goals makes you more enthusiastic and you become a beacon of light to those around you. Low energy activities keep you feeling dissatisfied with your life, you become more lethargic and experience boredom. You can become increasingly depressed because your life seems to be at a standstill, you aren’t accomplishing anything worthwhile or making an impact on the community around you.
And what we all long for inside it to make an impact and an imprint on the minds and hearts of those around us. But as we spend countless hours each week engaged in activities that only serve to temporarily entertain us, we miss out on opportunities to burst through the self-imposed ceiling of success we think restrains us.

But I think I have to ask myself: What do I get out of pursuing low energy activities?

We don’t do anything that we don’t get something out of. Even if what we get is a “confirmation” of our own lack of self-worth, self-esteem or sense of deserving. Perhaps we are afraid that our success will put us out of touch with our friends or family. Maybe we believe that there is a limit to how much we can achieve and these activities hold us below that limit. Maybe our preconceived notions about successful people are negative and by not being as successful we think we are somehow better than them. Whatever the underlying motivation, there is something that has us delaying our success instead of tackling it full force. And most of these underlying beliefs are necessary or true to our lives at this point. When we ask this question, we empower ourselves to choose more productive, high energy activities that make us feel so much better about ourselves.

That’s how I came up with this blog. I made a decision that I was going to log off of Facebook and read some articles in Psychology Today Magazine. I finished reading an article and felt so much better about the way I had spent those 15 minutes. While I thought about how good that felt, I knew I needed to write about that good feeling. These words are a product of that introspection. And you know what, I feel even better having written this and can’t wait to see how I will be inspired to spend my time this afternoon.

So I encourage you to log off that website, put down that controller, turn off that TV and start by doing one thing that moves you towards your goal. Like the Lays potato chip slogan, I bet you can’t do just one.

Some tips for engaging more consistently in high energy activities:

1. Have a specific goal (or set of goals) in mind. Know what it is you want to accomplish. Think of what it will look like when the goal is accomplished. To get someplace, you have to know where you are going.
2. Write down your goals and have copies in places where you can look at them frequently. These will be reminders to you of what you want to accomplish. This will help you keep focused.
3. Notice when you are engaged in a low energy activity and choose to get back to achieving your goals. Many of us habitually engage in low energy activities and we start doing them by default, as if on autopilot. SNAP OUT OF IT. Post your goal reminders near the things that have become used for low energy activities; on the computer, TV, game system or refrigerator.
4. Get an accountability buddy. Have someone in your life (a friend, a life coach, a counselor) who will remind you of those things you want to accomplish and hold you to them.
5. Join/create a Mastermind group. You will not only inspire each other with your passion for what you want to accomplish, you will also have accountability buddies and another source of inspired ideas that could help get you moving in the right direction.
6. When you get an inspired idea, start working on it. When we start looking at what we want to accomplish we can ask ourselves “What is something I can do right now to move me in the direction of my goal?” When the ideas come, we have to get cracking.
   

The more you engage in high energy activities, the more this will become habitual in your life. Then you won’t be able to help achieving your dreams and desires and you will create a sense of success and prosperity in your life that will draw the physical manifestations of those feelings into your experience.

Click Next

Some of us may be old enough to remember playing a scratched record. Others have to refer to a scratched CD or DVD. What happens is still the same, when the needle (or laser) hit's the scratch, it jumps back to some previous point and replays the same music (or scene) over and over again. Some DVD and CD's just stop playing at all right at that point.

We actually do the same thing in life. As children we go along just fine. We play, experiment with and experience life until something traumatic happens to us. Maybe a parent always called us stupid, or we got whipped for things we didn't do or maybe never got picked for sports or were picked on by older siblings or bullies. Maybe we were physically, emotionally or sexually abused. Whatever the event (or sequence of events) they scratch our life. And that scratch makes us play an event over and over in our minds until it created a pattern in our lives.

Many of the patterns we experience in life are replays of an earlier trama that we experienced but had no control over. Later in life, we subconsciously recreate the events with a different cast of characters. Once we understand our creative power in life, we can press stop on that old story and create a new life.

We are the creative force behind our lives, but we forget this spiritual truth as we learn to play the victim and blame others for our disappointments. And while we didn't ask for the initial event, the replication of that event in our lives is something we can do something about. And it starts with taking responsibility; not for the initial events but for our role in replaying them now that we have a better understanding of who we are and the power God has gifted us with.

Taking responsibility is like finally waking up to the unconscious patterns we have allowed to replay in our lives and consciously learning to make a change. It allows us to see that what we fear isn't real anymore. It has already happened and doesn't have to continue if we are dedicated to writing a new chapter in our lives. Now we can pay attention to the decisions we make that lead us down the same path and the people we draw to us to play the perpetrators in our drama. Now we can say NO to playing the role of victim and take our rightful place as VICTORIOUS creations of God.

We can move the needle to the next song, forward to the next scene or change the music or movie entirely. It's our choice and being responsible for the choices you make now will open the door to abundance, happiness and success that you never thought possible.

So what will you do, continue replaying the drama or move powerfully forward. The choice is yours.

May the Face of Death Teach us to Live

This week has been burdened by death. For those in the DC area, we have lost 9 souls in a devastating subway train crash. In the midst of that, the nation mourned the loss of Ed McMahon. Yesterday afternoon, we were greeted with news of the passing of Farrah Faucett. And as I ended my work day yesterday evening, Michael Jackson suddenly bid us farewell.

In the wake of these terrible incidents, the news was flooded with stories of the lives these people lived. Stories about dreams they chased, goals they accomplished and lives they touched. And I started thinking about life, my life. What legacy did I want to leave behind? What did I hope people remembered most about me? What did I want to have accomplished when my time to pass on came?

And most importantly to me - What am I doing now to make these things reality?

Despite the troubles any of these people faced, or any negativity they were apart of, they made an attempt to truly live - To discover and express their passion and purpose in life while they were with us. In music, activism, acting, hosting, serving our country in war, doing hair or even fulfilling a goal of driving a subway train, they made their own indelible mark on the world or at least their small portion of it. And even those who were "taken away too soon," we will never forget how they touched us with their compassion, creativity, hope, joy and love.

And even in death, they teach us how to live. They show us to live each day like it's our last, achieve our hearts desires, leave no word unsaid and no deed undone, let go of any grudges and express our love and appreciation for those we care about while we have the opportunity. They teach us to live without regrets and to excel in spite of our fear to be the best we can be.

Then when we reach that final day, whether expected or unexpected, it will all be well with our souls.

Don't hold back your passion, purpose or promise. You are here to leave a mark on this world in your own unique way. Release your maximum potential, changing your life and showing those around you how brightly they too can shine if they just expose the light of their gifts, the light of their spirit. Then we are sure to hear these words in our souls, "Well done my good and faithful servant."

Ade And Melissa - SYTYCD

Ade surely has a ... um "following" just look BEHIND him....lol


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